Madwoman Book Review
Disclaimer: I know this is a long review. But I loved the book too much to cut it short. If you don’t have the time or patience to read it all, just read the text in red… please, please, pretty please.
The Madwoman in the Volvo: My Year of Raging Hormones, a memoir by Sandra Tsing Loh, is hysterically funny, disturbingly dark and fiercely intelligent. Loh is a master storyteller who will captivate you with tales of her turbulent journey through perimenopause. I highly recommend the book for all women, but especially for those of us who are entering this mysterious phase of life. It’s great for men as well, to help prepare them to dodge flying pot roasts.
Think the subject of menopause isn’t relevant to you? Think again. Sandra reports that by 2015, almost one in two American women will be menopausal. And the hormonal shifts of perimenopause usually begin in the late thirties to mid-forties, lasting for four to fifteen years.
You may know Sandra Tsing Loh as a beloved public radio personality and one-woman show dynamo. Now she’s also being called a menopause expert. I was thrilled to discover that Sandra had recorded an Audible version of Madwoman. Who could resist that distinctive, irreverent voice? And boy, did she deliver, from her biting, sardonic wit to her somber, remorseful confessions. My earbuds and I were one from beginning to end.
This woman can find humor in anything. In fact, I tweeted Sandra as I was reading to say, “Listening to Madwoman now! Laughing, crying, RELATING to all of it.” She replied shortly after with, “Thanks, Patricia! Laughing and crying are a good combo, I find, and probably amazing for our pores!”
Pretty early on in the book, Sandra shares the gut-wrenching story of how she, “a forty something suburban mother, became involved in a wild and ill-conceived extramarital affair.” Keep in mind that my novels feature a wife, mother and professor who cheats on her husband with a former student. So I’m not faint of heart on the subject of infidelity. Yet, the unwavering honesty with which Sandra details the havoc it wreaked on the lives of spouses, children, parents, siblings, and in-laws destroyed me. Her brutal, unforgiving self-reflection reveals a level of courage that very few people possess. I hope Sandra knows how many women she speaks for.
The insights this book reveals about relationship dynamics are spot on. Sandra’s descriptions of our different husbands, real and imagined, resonated with me more than I want to admit. She says the first husband is the stable one who comes home from a business trip and comments on the roof needing to be fixed before asking how you are. The second husband is the attentive, supportive guy who can talk with you all day about feelings. There are husbands three and four as well, but you’ll have to read the book to find out about them.
Like most of us, Sandra hasn’t actually found or married all four husbands. The point is that women are often looking for a man who doesn’t exist, who’s all the husbands wrapped up in one. We eventually learn that many of the needs we expect a man to satisfy are things we can only provide for ourselves. By the way, I believe Sandra’s “four husbands” theory applies to boyfriends and same-sex partners too.
After riding the roller coaster of the crushing collapse of her marriage and the on-again, off-again attempts to make a go of it with the man she had an affair with, I was relieved that there was a relatively happy ending. And in case you read this, Sandra, I want you to know that I literally had to pull my car over and sob as I listened to you read the letter your sister made you write to Mr. Y. Everyone should write a letter like that at some point in their lives.
In Madwoman, Sandra takes the time to explain the science behind the changes of perimenopause and how they can affect our brains and bodies. But she doesn’t play professor for long before tossing in some juicy LOL commentary. And her rich repertoire of familiar, nostalgic pop culture references is always an added bonus.
“Our symptoms are various. They include mood swings, sudden weight gain, and the appearance of morning chin hairs that by noon are long enough to braid and twirl into thick Princess Leia buns.”
How could you not be tickled by the image of Princess Leia buns protruding from your chin?
I’d love to go on and on about this book and the ways it rocked my world and made me feel less alone as a perimenopause warrior. But you probably wouldn’t read much more because we’re all too busy and overscheduled, which the book addresses, of course.
To sum up, the lessons I learned about how the raging hormones of perimenopause can potentially affect our relationships and our lives were surprisingly valuable. In the humor there is depth and meaning, and at the very end, Sandra even lists some helpful tips for how to get through it all. Real tips. Serious tips.
Grab the book. You really must. Kindles, Nooks, hardcovers, and paperbacks are great. But for this one, I’m partial to the audiobook, read in Sandra’s unmistakable voice, brimming with candor, humility, and delicious sarcasm.
Enjoy!
*MUST WATCH EXTRA* I know you have to run off to get to work or go to Zumba or make dinner, but first, please watch this 5 minute video of Sandra on Bill Maher’s Real Time! She talks about the book, sharing funny and painfully true observations about menopause: Sandra Tsing Loh on Bill Maher’s Real Time on HBO
Buy Links for The Madwoman in the Volvo:
6 Comments
Oh my hell! You made me want to read her book when you first told me about it in our little conversations about menopause, but after watching that video clip, I am getting it right now. Sandra is a scream and I love her already. Anyone who can make me laugh while going through this is my hero. LOL. Thanks for sharing your review. 🙂
How did I not know of her? Patricia, I OWE YOU BIG TIME. xoxo -c
Great review.
Shelly, I know, isn’t she funny?! Can’t wait to hear what you think of the book! Thanks so much for commenting.
Corie, you’re always “in the know” about everyone & everything, especially in the literary world! Glad I could finally introduce you to a new author. Thanks for commenting!xoxo
Hey Patricia,
I love this post and adore the video of Sandra with Bill Maher. Only wish the clip were longer. Will NEED to read this book. She is amazing, as are you for bringing this to our attention!
So happy you enjoyed the post and the video, Mary! I think you’d love the book. And I think there may be more of Sandra on Bill Maher’s show. I need to look for that episode! I agree – the clip is too short.